He was never looking to solve the culture wars or solve Americas problems. When he follows that up with and f*ck Tiger Woods, too, its hard to not look at him and assume that he was something of a prophet. In medieval Bristol, one casually referred to a glade called Fuckinggrove, while up in Chester, one could proudly sport a name like Roger Fuckbythenavel. ", 20. It seems only right. "So, have a little fun. Some people have to go to work and don't have time for all that. Your house is really just a place to keep your stuff. These are the times of world peace, but domestic warfare; more leisure, but less fun; more kinds of food, but less nutrition. Comedian George Carlin appears at Wheeler Opera House in Aspen, Colo., in 2007 during HBO's 13th Annual U.S. He despised euphemism and the policing of language, reviled what he called the continued puss-ification of the American male and rebuked his countrymen who would trade away a little of their freedom for the feeling the illusion of security.. Not that my conception was the tale of two young lovers, carried away by passion and strong wine. "If you cant say something nice about a person, go ahead. Heres Our Review Of Cocaine Bear: Oh Hell Yes! On Friday the US Supreme Court eliminated the constitutional right to abortion and handed the law back to individual states, potentially putting millions of women's lives at . ", 43. Jeep Wrangler "20 Years of Rubicon" Super Bowl 2023 Commercial. "People always tell me 'Have a nice day.' Thou shalt be faithful to the provider of thy nookie. But, she added, if youre a comedian, youve got to be funny., If youre going to take the audience over the line, youve got to construct things in a way that theyre willingly crossing it with you, she said. That leftist bent was unmistakable in Carlins standup, too: He railed against police violence, championed prison reform and environmentalism and condemned organized religion. He remained close to his older brother, Patrick, throughout his . Before his death in June 2008, comedian George Carlin spent 10 years working on a memoir, Last Words, with his longtime friend Tony Hendra. ", 77. When he was a kid and the polio vaccine became available, he got the polio vaccine.. And because my mother really loved him. Soon enough you'll be dead and burning in Hell with the rest of your family. From his 2001 album Complaints and Grievances, this was not the first time Carlin commented on religion, but it might be his best routine on the subject, as he takes on the Ten Commandmentsandreduces them rather quickly, ultimately leaving us with a mere two commandments: 1. To approach these with thoughts of Godiva and Russell Stover is to miss their point, which is whats sloshing around inside them. ", 50. Yep, [t]heres always a George Carlin clip. He sure had a blast while pointing out inconsistencies when it comes to the group we now know as the far right. Near the end of his remarks, Maher invoked the comedian George Carlin, a personal hero whose iconoclastic spirit, he seemed to believe, could never thrive in such a thin-skinned and overly entitled era. "War is rich old men protecting their property by sending middle class and lower class men off to die. Comedian George Carlin pictured at his Brentwood, Ca., office June 12, 1986, demonstrates his long-deferred acting ambition in his newest special for Home Box Office and in a movie now in production. "May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house. ", 75. "Religion is like a pair of shoes: Find one that fits for you, but don't make me wear your shoes. Several times during the pandemic, Carlin has drawn attention for a routine from his 1999 special, You Are All Diseased, in which he mischievously suggests that a childhood spent swimming in the polluted Hudson River was the reason he didnt catch polio. Nearly 14 years after his death, his provocative humor has been embraced by people across the political spectrum. He was known for his black comedy and reflections on politics, the English language, psychology, religion, and taboo subjects. Dec 3, 2022. "Weather forecast for tonight: dark. Weve learned how to make a living but not a life. Moorehead, Bob. At around 2:00 p.m. on October 30, 1973, East Coast station WBAI-FM warned it was about to air a recording with potentially offensive language and proceeded to play an offshoot of Carlin's routine . ", 124. Shortly before his death in 2008, Carlin released his final HBO special,Its Bad For Ya. "It's important in life if you don't give a s**t. It can help you a lot. And if that wasnt what she meant, then what exactly did Oh, jolly shit! mean? A word is presented; a curse is squirted. ", 54. "Conservatives want live babies so they can train them to be dead soldiers. And then it was like, this is not my job. "People are wonderful one at a time. Throughout the routine, Carlin notes the differences between the two sports baseball is played in the spring, when all the plants are coming to life; football is played in the fall, when everything is dying making it clear that they couldnt be more dissimilar. Everything He ever makes dies. Getting conceived had been hard enough. ", 80. As for the poor, they tell us theyve lost all incentive because weve given them too much money. These are times of world peace, but domestic warfare; more leisure and less fun; higher postage, but slower mail; more kinds of food, but less nutrition. Carlin didnt hesitate to criticize presidents by name Bill Clinton and George W. Bush among them but, more often, he spoke in broader terms and addressed institutional failings. Isn't it amazing that George Carlin - comedian of the 70's and 80's - could write something so very eloquent and so very appropriate. ", 52. 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Perhaps nothing can make long-gone people seem realer to us than evidence that they used words like fuck. ", 109. The people are f**ked. So while I sprang from something good and positive, by the time I showed up I was a distinct inconvenience. ", 68. "The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity. "There's no present. During his 50-year career, irreverent comedian George Carlin stood in front of his audiences, questioning, condemning, and cutting through what he called "middle class crap." Take care of the planet. No neo-natal care, no daycare no welfare, if youre pre-born, youre fine, if youre preschool, youre f*cked., Carlin then pushed forth with one hell of a kicker. Maybe this time itll work. At times, Maron said, his anger became more pronounced than his ability to speak funny within it. But in every hourlong set he performed, Maron added, there would be one bit that was worth the entire special.. "The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. Kelly Carlin said her father was 99 percent progressive and that he raised her in a manner that today might be contemptuously dismissed as woke. Maron contended that free-speech conflicts have shifted since Carlins era in such a way that it doesnt make sense to drag Carlin back into them. They own all the important land, they own and control the corporations that've long since bought and paid for, the senate, the congress, the state houses, the city halls, they got the . Carlins rueful 1996 routine about conservatives opposition to abortion (they will do anything for the unborn, but once youre born, youre on your own) became a newly viral phenomenon and was shown on a recent broadcast of the MSNBC program 11th Hour. A video clip of a Carlin bit about how Americans are ravenous for war (so were good at it, and its a good thing we are were not very good at anything else anymore!) has been tweeted by Representative Ilhan Omar, Democrat of Minnesota. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong. They dont wanna hear from you. Its still bracing to hear the bitter wordplay in his lament: Its called the American dream because you have to be asleep to believe it., When he spoke, you always felt like you were hearing the truth, or his truth, said the comedian Bill Burr. Because of that status, Carlin is frequently summoned in contemporary debates over how comedians choose to use their platforms. "If the black box flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isnt the whole airplane made out of that stuff? 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. That fight was already won, Maron said. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, cartridge living, thow-away morality, one-night stands, overweight bodies and pills that do everything from cheer, to prevent, quiet or kill. They will do anything for the unborn, but once youre born [middle finger gesture], youre on your own. This marriage had gone south long before. George Carlin performing one of his last shows in 2008. ", 40. Popular ethnic slurs to the contrary, the Irish do enjoy sex at least the last ten seconds or so. "Isnt it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do 'practice? The 37-year-old actress wore a midi dress . "Tell people there's an invisible man in the sky who created the universe, and the vast majority will believe you. W hen news broke of a leaked proposal to overturn Roe v Wade - the landmark ruling that enshrines abortion rights in the US - it didn't take long for George Carlin's name to start trending . "Isnt making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool? "Overlake Elders Reverse Earlier Stance on Pastor Case." George Carlin would have been anti-vaccination, she said. No nothing! I have major psychotic f**king hatreds. His trans jokes are the exact same, lazy bullshit every transphobe uses, and it completely lacks any of the wit he's famous for. ", 46. Macdonald, Sally. We've conquered outer space, but not inner space; we've done larger things, but not better things; we've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul; we've split the atom, but not our prejudice; we write more, but learn less; plan more, but accomplish less; we make faster planes, but longer lines; we learned to rush, but not to wait; we have more weapons, but less peace; higher incomes, but lower morals; more parties, but less fun; more food, but less appeasement; more acquaintances, but fewer friends; more effort, but less success. George had unwavering . ", 4. After noting that capital punishment will only deter people who are afraid to die, Carlin gives us his plan to expand the death penalty in radical new ways. ", 106. Take for instance this stand-up comedy routine from the late, great George Carlin which he performed in 1996 on his HBO special Back in Town. Carlins indignant voice feels so impossible to duplicate that quotes he never said and entire essays he didnt write are often wrongly attributed to him. For several generations Rockaway Beach had been a favorite weekend retreat for New York's alcohol-crazed Irish youth in search of sex and sun. 2. "We have multiplied our possessions but reduced our values. Your culture and entertainment cheat-sheet. "I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. For strip-mined mountain's majesty. Comedy Arts Festival. "Easiest thing in the world, to raise a kid, if you follow the steps. Profanity channels our essence without always making logical sense, leaving us quaking at the utterance of what are, in the end, just some words. Associated Press. Profanity channels our essence. This material may not be reproduced without permission. ", Want more great quotes? Clearly not., Even so, Kelly Carlin said, is it dangerous when a culture wants to shut people down for speech? "If it requires a uniform, its a worthless endeavor. When controversy engulfed Dave Chappelles 2021 special The Closer, which was criticized as transphobic and prompted walkouts at Netflix, Carlins name was invoked, even though no one could be certain what position he might have taken: Would he have criticized Chappelle as intolerant or defended his right to express himself? Onlookers have sucked in their breath to hear the medieval damning someone to hell, the 20s flapper telling someone to go fuck themselves, and the modern person calling someone a bitch. Its part of that showoff and dropout syndrome. "It's never just a game when you're winning. ", 76. ", 18. IBSN 0-9639496-6-7 (pp. You come back a week later. Trending Super Bowl LVII. ", 90. Here is the transcript: "The planet is a self correcting system. The odds against my future existence were even longer: this particular weekend was a single isolated sex-fest during a marital separation that had lasted more than a year. ", 89. He's not a cheese. We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. ", 103. "I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? If youre pre-born, youre fine, if youre preschool, youre fucked.. These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion; tall men, but short character; steep in profits, but shallow relationships. Carlin was arrested in Milwaukee in 1972 on obscenity and disorderly conduct charges. Theyre anti-woman, simple as it gets, he said. And Carlins routine resonates in pointing up how arbitrary the power of curse words seems when we consider that they are, ultimately, only words. Jeff Kravitz/FilmMagic Inc for HBO/Getty Images hide caption Try spelling Evian backward. It is largely an archaism now: In the 1960s and 70s, the trailblazing Representative Bella Abzug was fond of it as a general term for persons she disliked, but it seems to have faded away. Curses Aren't 'Just Words'. ", 91. We've become long on quantity, but short on quality. He was giving you the truth of what he felt, which most of us dont do. Check out100 Best Dad Jokes50 Thinking of You Quotes50 Friday Quotes50 Monday Motivation Quotes101Bad Puns200Jokes for Kids, Seven Words You Can Never Say on Television. "I have lots of ideas. ", 22. ", 3. ", 26. Despite the fact that Babe Ruth was neither the miscreant nor the cuckold involved, that piece of paper might well intrigue fans as much as anything that happened to the man before he broke baseballs home-run record in 1920. "When you step on the brakes, your life is in your foots hands. "Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesnt mean that the circus has left town. They own everything. "I don't have pet peeves. is subject to similar questions. There were other court jesters before Carlin and alongside Carlin, but Carlin was more powerful and dangerous to the king, said Journey Gunderson, the executive director of the National Comedy Center, which is home to more than 25,000 items from Carlins archives. That's all I want, that's all you need in life, is a little place for . George Carlin's Estate/HBO ", 63. The continuing relevance of Carlins material is partly a result of how he learned to compose and refine it over a career that spanned nearly 50 years. 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", 79. ", 67. For Earth Day 2018, here's a video featuring the stand-up comedian George Carlin who shared his thoughts in around 2007 on saving the planet, plastics, Earth Day, and the planet's natural . ", 96. ", 82. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throw-away morality, one-night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer to quiet, to kill. In Carlins list, for example, I am pretty sure I have never in my lifetime (which began in 1965) heard anyone called a cocksucker, and I have certainly never leveled the term. "Never argue with an idiot. Excerpted from Last Words by George Carlin with Tony Hendra. He drank, he got drunk, he hit people. A word is presented; a curse is squirted. He had yet to be stripped of his sevenTour de France titles, and he was seen as an American hero. "Everyone smiles in the same language. It's not even just the hypocrisy, it's that his material has gotten noticeably worse ever since he started on this shit. It is a time when there is much in the show window and nothing in the stockroom; a time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit delete. "Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit. But there is an I in independence, individuality, and integrity. Of course, Carlin never had any problem taking shots at someone the rest of the country loved, but what makes this bit fascinating is how much public opinion has come around to agreeing with Carlins side. The very first host was George Carlin. "That's why they call it the American Dream, because you have to be asleep to believe it. Your membership is the foundation of our sustainability and resilience. We think of profanity as a . It requires a scholarship to appreciate Lenny Bruce, Maron said. Not only does he want to go bring back crucifixions, he wants them to be naked. "I think everyone should treat one another in a Christian manner. Since SCOTUS is going to overturn #RoeVWade I think this one from George Carlin is appropriate. "Everyone should try to scratch their name on the bomb of life. . At first I was like, Ill be the interpreter and tell them what I think he meant. Here's the full list of nominees and winners. George Carlin bit is still a classic. "Some people see the glass half full. "Avatar: The Way of Water". Having this essay flow from the pen of an unnamed student who bore witness to this unspeakable act of violence made sense: surely such a teen would have valuable words of wisdom or cautions we all should heed. We give them great power over us. May 3, 2022. '", 73. Into my colon! Apparently, the bartender and Mrs. Ruth had eyes for each other and did something about it. (My older brother, Patrick, can't say the same.) These are days of two incomes, but more divorces; these are times of fancier houses, but broken homes. May 3, 2022. ", 48. Carlin stood there, coolly rattling them off in a way that no comedian could have on a commercially released album 10 years before, and the sky did not fall. ", 114. They should be giving their money to you. The point, then, the essence, is the squawking sense of offense, our coping with a blow via the visceral and immediate gesture of swatting back to cause a compensatory offense. Amanda Seyfried looked effortlessly chic in a black and white strapless dress while posing on the red carpet of the 34th Annual Producers Guild Awards.. On a Christmas Day when everything seemed to be going wrong and she was complaining about it, her daughter said, Mom, I thought on Christmas everybody was supposed to be jolly! The mother shot back, Oh, jolly shit! My friend was still laughing at that years later, when she shared the story with me, and I cherish the memory of that episode long after it happened, even though I wasnt there. Deal with it. Its a classic bit that he re-worked several times over the years (the above clip is from 1990) without ever altering the core hypothesis. ", 62. My dad was pro-science, pro-rational thinking, pro-evidence-based medicine. 125 George Carlin Quotes. Gunderson, of the National Comedy Center, described Carlin as a leader who didnt want to hold all the power. The ultimate lesson he had for us, she said, is that we have the unlimited right to challenge everything, to never stop thinking critically about any source of power or any institution even Carlin himself. "Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it. ", 17. ", 115. You know why? Aug. 10, 2013 Updated: Aug. 11, 2013 9:39 a.m. 5. The legendary comic, who died in 2008 at the age of 71, is also the subject of an upcoming two-part documentary, George Carlins American Dream, which debuts on HBO Max later this month: By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. About this rating. He targeted the orthodoxy and the establishment, alwayswith remarkable success. We have bigger houses and smaller families; more conveniences, but less time; We have more degrees, but less sense; more knowledge, but less judgment; more experts, but more problems; more medicine, but less wellness. "Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity. George Denis Patrick Carlin (May 12, 1937 - June 22, 2008) was an American stand-up comedian, actor, author and social critic.Carlin was noted for his black . Once a week. 1. Conservatives dont give a sh*t about you until youre military age conservatives want live babies so they can raise them to be dead soldiers, he argued. When you yell Damn! or Fuck!, you are not simply uttering a word. "Electricity is really just organized lightning. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. ", 112. Heres Our Review Of Cocaine Bear: Oh Hell Yes! Have no idea what they 're doing, and taboo subjects, she said how. Created the universe, and integrity here is the transcript: & quot ; thing... Because of that status, Carlin released his final HBO special, Its a worthless endeavor no idea they... ; Avatar: the way to your house is really just a to! Lot of them are really good at it good at it t ] heres always a George Carlin frequently... The far right psychotic f * * king hatreds dead soldiers: Oh Hell Yes on your own is to. Interpreter and tell them what I think he meant to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong get... 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